Ex's new squeeze

I feel like no matter how awful or clean a break up is it always sucks to see your ex with their new squeeze. 
Recently my ex's friend friend requested me on Facebook. Which was very odd seeing as I have never met her before, and she is best friends with the girl who he cheated on me with. I shot him a short casual message just asking if he knew why she would want to be my FB friend. He messages me back

• "I'm not sure. I'll ask her. It might be because we're dating now."

I messaged back okay gotch ya. I thought the subject was over. The whole thing really didn't matter to me until I got a message from HER!

• "Hi. Sorry to create an awkward situation with an accidental friend request. I was just looking out of curiosity and must have hit the tab. I'm not a weirdo stalker, promise.  Anyway... Take care"

Uhhh... first off who dose she think she is using emoticons at me!? Second don't tell me you were basically stalking me and then tell me youre not a stalker. Third, in todays modern age "accidental friend requests" don't exist. Finally, why did she feel the need to message me?
I mean I can't judge too hard on the looking out of curiosity thing. We all do it. I honestly think she was just trying to slip that request in there in hopes I would accept it. Had this been a year ago I totally would have. But that just would cause me more stress in my life which I am hoping to avoid. This is why I didn't respond despite writing some clever draf responses. I have moved on with my life and I am much more happier with him out of it! 
It's just weird to me that she is the best friend of the girl he cheated on me with. Heres a word of advice for you Jessica. Hes NEVER going to change not for you or for anyone else. Hes a lying manipulative, cheating, son of a bitch (literally). Which you I am sure have already witnessed first hand. So as one ex to a future ex dont let his smooth talking trick you. 

The murder of Fredrick

I dated this guy who was a total jerk amongst other things. He was a lying, cheating ass hole and a fish murderer.
I had this beautiful blue beta fish named Fredrick. I loved that fish he kept me very good company. He even sat shot go with me in a big Tupperware container when I moved two states away. He was a good travel buddy he was not one of those back seat drivers, gosh I hate those.
When I moved in with this jerk of a boyfriend he always ragged on me for not paying attention to Fredrick... Uhh its a fish, not a dog. Then suddenly one day I came home from work and noticed Fredrick wasn't there. I didn't want to ask my boyfriend what happend because I knew he was going to make some smart ass remark about me not paying attention to the fish. So for months neither of us spoke of the disappearance of Fredrick. It wasn't until we broke up and I was moving out that the truth was told.
He told me the was tired of feeding him and me not paying attention to him so he stuck him in the freezer!! He said it would have been painless and his little heart would have just stopped beating.
I had gone this whole time thinking that Fredrick had just died because thats what fish do. They dont have longevity on their side. But now I was faced with the shocking fact that my boyfriend thought I was an unfit fish owner and that Fredrick was better off dead then with me! I accused him of being Jeffery Dahmer and this is a sign of being a sociopath. I also informed him that he was the biggest ass hole of all time!
So today I was on a walk and walked by a pet store. I went in and bought myself a new beta fish named Frank, I am big on alliteration. I asked the lady at the store if I could have a green fish because the blue fishes reminded me of Fredrick. I told her I know I sounded crazy but she seemed to understand. Anyways today I throw both my middle fingers up at the jerk who thinks I am a bad fish owner. I am not the one who purposely killed the fish!!
I think Frank and I are going to be very happy.